Under The Knife

For the first time in my life, I'm having surgery. I'm 25, I've only ever had stitches once, when my daughter was born. I've also never broken a bone, had a concussion, anything. Now, I'm having surgery. It's minor. Three little cuts on my belly, but they're putting me completely under for it. I'm terrified. I can't get past that. I should be more worried about the results of the surgery.

Why am I having surgery you ask? It all started back in October when I had my IUD removed due to pain. The ER and my doctor said my cervix was inflamed and treated me with antibiotics. Nearly 6 months later, my cervix was still inflamed, so my doctor sent me for cryosurgery (where they freeze your cervix). This doctor looked around, felt around, and came back with a scarier diagnosis. Endometriosis. That's a scary word. No matter how you slice it, there's 'scar tissue' on/in/around my uterus and ovaries (possibly). Depending on the severity of it, I may need to get pregnant ASAP, rather than waiting the year and a half we'd planned on. Depending on the severity of it, I may not have that option.

Of course, my doctor could be able to treat this while he's in on Wednesday.

I'm terrified. Not just of the surgery, but of the diagnosis. I have faith in God and have been praying. I don't think it will be that bad. I'm just the type of person that has to think on the worst of it, prepare for that, so that I can cope if it IS that bad.

This post - is for me. For me to get the words out into text in a way that helps calm me a little. It's also for those concerned. I'll try to follow up after the surgery. I have to spend 24 hours flat in bed, on my back. Thanks to family, I have my brother in law out here to help me with little A. I should be fine a few days after the surgery, though.